Day #170 - M-I-L

M-I-L (Mother-In-Law)...It was Joleen's Birthday on Friday and Travis, Eric (T's Brother), Austin (T's Nephew) and I (T's Wife) took Joleen (T's Mother) to lunch on Saturday to celebrate her Birthday. We went to the Brick Oven in Layton where we proceeded to pig out on Pizza, Pasta and Salad.

I am happy to say I think she liked the shirt we got for her. It is a lime green light weight jacket shirt. I got the shirt from Chico's at the Park City Outlet. WOW - they have some fun bright colors in their store. The one weird thing was their sizing - 0, 1,2,3 - UH...Which one is Medium? I thought probably a 2 and I asked a lady in the store who obviously shops there for herself and had picked up a shirt, so I asked her how it worked. She looked down at me and said, "Maybe you should ask someone who works here" - OOOOOOOKKKKKKKay...The lady wasn't necessarily rude, but I knew she was irritated that I had bothered her. That hasn't happened to me for a long time - I was pretty taken a-back by it. Now that I think on it again I am probably just projecting my own "stuff" onto that poor unsuspecting woman...There is no way I can really know what she was thinking, is there?

Anyway, I did finally run into one of the store clerks while I was looking around and she informed me 1 is a small medium and 2 is a large medium. I have to wonder if they are just trying to make all the women feel smaller by numbering their sizes so different then the rest of the world or what? Well, Joleen can now say she has a size "1" hanging in her closet.

I have to say a word about Joleen. There is that dooms-day stereotype out there about Mother's-in-law who are terrible, bossy, interfering, difficult to be with, etc. I have been truly blessed to have Joleen as mine. She has never made me feel belittled or bad about myself and has built me up over the years. She is traditional elegance. What do I mean by that? She is polite and polished - she uses separate salad bowls for jello at dinner - she makes cakes decorated like the flag on the 4th of July (yes I remember that one) - her home is always clean and welcoming - she laughs a lot, but never AT someone - She always remembers Birthdays; I've forgotten hers twice over the last 16 years and never felt like she held it against me or Travis, although I am sure it hurt her feelings and now I always panic at least 3 times in the week before her Birthday (TRAVIS...WHAT DAY IS IT? The 3rd? Schwew!) - She never throws tantrums (that would be weird) and she is always positive in manner and speech, even when she is feeling stubborn.

I think I realized very recently that she is not interfering, not because she doesn't want to know, but because she prefers for us to share with her what we want her to know. Joleen never talks about anything negative going on with the other kids in the family - she only tells us about the good things that are happening. It took me a long time to get the hang of that in the Barker family because my family is so much "up in your business" that we all seem to know what is going on in everyone's personal life. I don't think one way is better or worse then the other, just different...

The other thing I really admire about Joleen is her ambitious use of time. She works weekly at the Daughter of Utah Pioneers Museum, she travels for conventions through the museum, she is involved in the rodeo Days of 47, she works weekly at the Temple and of course is very involved in her Church callings, etc. Travis and I are very proud of her accomplishments and admire her for getting so involved in the things that matter the most to her.

I love you Joleen - Thank you for your support and love over the years - it has meant so much to me.

I Am Grateful,
HB

Diva Quote: "Sweater, n.:  garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly."  ~Ambrose Bierce - I thought this was cute...HB