Thursday, March 29, 2012

Day #368 - Fear is Good

I allow a lot of things to hold me back and I will put fear at the top of that list; more specifically "fear of failure". What I am learning about the fear of failure is it prevents me from even trying new things. Add to that the fear of looking stupid, being judged, not knowing the answers, not being in control, getting hurt, etc. and life's choices begin to look very limited.

These past few months I have had the opportunity to step into my fear and BRING IT!! 6 months ago I was approached by a company to chat about possible employment that would give me an opportunity to advance my career (Chilly - if you read this, call me before you react). I was flattered and intrigued to be considered and then later asked to join their company. We shared many discussions over the next few months, but it just didn't come together in a way that would work for either of us and I decided to stick with my current position for the next move season at least.

Fast forward to two months ago and I get another call that they still want to move forward in a partnership...terrible timing since this IS the busiest season and I am hip deep in moves. Somehow I knew it was too much to ask that I have the opportunity to transition in November...of course it HAD to be March. Anyway, after much deliberation of the many things I would give up and the many things I may gain, after much prayer and begging for guidance, I finally decided to go for it. The minute I finally made a decision, things started to come together for me. I feel very good about my decision to do something new.

The things I will miss are countless, but mostly it will be the amazing people I work with both at my company and the client company. I have developed close friendships with many people over the years and even more professional relationships w/people I respect and love working with. I will miss the transferee's that I have had the pleasure to serve. I feel a bit like I am deserting the boat in mid ocean, but will do everything I can to make sure they are taken care of before I leave and the person replacing me is armed with the information necessary to assist them and I will be available to anyone that needs anything from me after I leave. 

The position I am going to is a promotion in title and is a brand new department for this company. I will be a lone woman running the ship and will be expected to grow the business opportunities within the company. As I have thought about how I will do this, I have felt some renewed energy and the same kind of excitement I experienced at the beginning of my career in Relocation as I found ways to grow the account I have worked on over the past 13 years. I know I am good at the job I currently do, but I also know I have been stuck creatively for the last several years at work. I also know there was no way to grow in my current position and I need to experience growth in my job to remain motivated.

That being said...I am scared to death that I may fail; I am even more afraid not to try...fear is good.

I Am Grateful,
HB

Diva Quote: "Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy." Dale Carnegie

Sunday, March 25, 2012

Day #367 - Perspective

I was eating lunch with an old friend and mentor the other day and she told me a story...apparently they had a beloved family dog they lost to old age when her son was about 5 years old. This dog was an important part of their family and the little boy was absolutely devastated by the loss of this animal. In an effort to comfort her son, my friend told him the dog was in a better place and happily chasing squirrels in lush green parks. The boy asked if the dog was in heaven and she told him, "Yes". She told me he seemed to think hard about this for quite a while and then asked, "Mom, is Dog Heaven the same thing as Squirrel Hell?"

I LOVE this story. It is such a prime example of how perspective can change just about any situation I find myself in. Most of the time I am pretty good at ferreting out "the other side of the story" when dealing with difficult situations, but I have a harder time the closer the person is to me. Even then, I usually get to the "other side" eventually after the heat of the moment has past.

I have decided to pay closer attention to the lesson's I have been given the opportunity to learn during my short time here on Earth. I personally believe we are here to learn and grow and this year I am taking an active role in that process as it applies to my life.  I bet as I start paying attention to the challenges that present themselves, I will begin to spot patterns and recognize the life lesson I am being given the blessing to learn about. It should make for an interesting year.

I Am Grateful,
HB

Diva Quote: " In every mistake, there is a message. Some people miss the message because they're too busy berating themselves for the mistake" Unknown Author

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Day #366 - Hunger Games w/Mazza

So...I read the Hunger Games series and have the best neighbor friend ever who took me as her plus one to preview the movie this evening.

First, she took me to dinner at Mazza - it is a Mediterranean Restaurant on 9th S. & 9th E. in Salt Lake City. My friend Kathy is very adventurous. She is the type of person that is always up for trying new things, loves ethnic food experiences and loves to meet new people wherever she goes. She is super easy to talk to and is a great listener...just an all around lovely person whom I am so honored to know.

When I walked into the restaurant I was surprised at how beautiful it was. There were lots of hanging lantern chandeliers w/colorful stained glass accents, copper posts with designs cut in them that were lit from within and I am sure create a lovely ambiance at night and probably cast designs on the floor and tables. The ceiling was also industrial, but painted copper as well w/large copper moldings all around the top of the walls. It was a very formal but warm feeling and felt like a special place to eat - like good for a special occasion dinner.

Anyway, the food was VERY flavorful and I am looking forward to taking Travis there since his tastes run in that same "ethnic adventure" venue.

After dinner we went to the movie and got some decent seats. I was surprised when the theatre wasn't quite full to capacity and the best part about that was when this big man sat RIGHT next to Kathy when there were many seats available on our row. I pretty much laughed hard inside and we did chat with him a bit before the movie started and he was a very nice guy (who hadn't read the book). After the movie she was all sad that he had sat right next to her like that - it was hilarious.

I know you are dying for a movie review...well, we all know the premise of the books - kids fighting to the death. The idea is actually quite appalling and while watching the movie I realized I had gotten used to the idea while reading the books. The movie does a good job of making the deaths quick and cutting away before it gets too gory, or the camera shakes so bad it is hard to tell what is going on, but it was still disturbing to see some of it. I REALLY did NOT like the shaking camera effect...it was hard to watch sometimes, especially at the first of the movie - I don't know why they filmed it that way.

I will say I LOVED all of the casting. I wasn't sure I would like Peta, but he grew on me. I was super surprised at the choice of Woody Harrelson for Hamish, but he was fantastic. I also liked how the movie really followed the book. There was only one real change and I thought the movie made more sense than the book in that regard - you will know when you see it. I also really liked the outfits - the girl on fire stuff turned out pretty cool.

I do recommend the movie; it was very good and being a little disturbed means it certainly wasn't boring. What a fun night.

I Am Grateful,
HB

Diva Quote: "You have to learn the rules of the game. And then you have to play better than anyone else.” Albert Einstein

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Day #365 - WOOT!! 1 Year Mark!!

I found myself a little reluctant to write my 365th post...this marks the end of my 1 years worth of gratitude posts. It only actually took me about 545 days to write 365 posts, but at least I finished what I started, right?

So...upon reflection, what have I learned? Finding something to be grateful for every day is not difficult...finding something NEW to be grateful for is not always as easy, but totally worth looking for.

Some of my favorite discoveries were the very simplest of items - like my Bic Pens, I still think "I love this pen" when I pick one up to use it each day and realize just how MUCH I love them when I try to use another pen to write sloppy and fast with; there is a time and place for a special pen as well, of course. I would never have understood this pen thing if I hadn't taken the time to really think about it and there are countless days that had me REALLY looking at life around me to discover that new thing I needed to recognize was good in my life.

I also know it is just fine to be grateful each day for the same things - the sunrise, the hummingbird, my husband, a safe drive home, a garage door opener, snow, no snow, my friends, my family, books, good health to name just a few.

I also know it is just fine to be cranky now and then as well. I am happy that my intention was usually pointed toward gratitude so that I could turn the cranky around quickly and I tried hard not to write as negatively as I sometimes wanted too, which is a HUGE step forward from past journals and private books.

Because my family is so important to me, and a recurring theme in my posts, it seems fitting to end my gratitude posts w/one for my Dad who had hip replacement surgery today. I stopped by for a visit after work and got to spend an hour all alone with him. He looked SOOOO good and chatted away about a bunch of different things. It made me realize I don't spend much ALONE time with my Father. It was wonderful to have him all to myself.

I am so excited he got this new hip! Not that his bad hip really slowed him down. My brother Jason told me Dad had him out until dark putting up a fence last night - the night before his surgery. He had to get one more thing in before he was laid up for awhile. I think this new hip is going to make such a huge difference in his physical life and I can't wait to see him get up and going in a few days - he will do GREAT!

I am sure I will keep writing, although I have plans to change/shift my focus. If nothing else this blog has been a great way to keep track of the small & big, the past & present, the significant & insignificant events of my life - Thank you for sharing them with me.

I Am Grateful,
HB

Diva Quote: "Cultivate the habit of being grateful for every good thing that comes to you, and to give thanks continuously. And because all things have contributed to your advancement, you should include all things in your gratitude.” - Ralph Waldo Emerson 

Sunday, March 18, 2012

Day #364 - iPod

I have been iPod challenged lately. Travis' iPod stopped working correctly and so he took over mine for a bit and I took exception to this when I had to resort to the Nook Book at the gym, which is great during cardio, but troublesome during weights. I was constantly worried I would lose it or it would get taken while I pumped iron (I sound so tuff). Then my newish old iPod stopped working...what the heck is wrong with these things?

Yesterday, we remedied the situation and both got a new iPod Nano. Last night I transferred a bulk of songs to the device and made sure it got fully charged up and was just listening to it and it keeps pausing after a few minutes...I'm confused, but not yet defeated. I will get to the bottom of this little puzzle...I hope.


The iPod Nano is SUPER TINY...it definitely makes me feel like fat fingers when I handle it. It does have a built in step counter, which I plan to try, and timers and things for working out, which is super cool, and a clip on feature so I no longer have to resort to using the Bracket for my listening devices.


Now that I am starting to feel more recovered from my sick time, I hope to try it out next week at the gym. Nothing is worse than being bored or uninspired during a work out and it is always fun to get a new gadget to play with.

I Am Grateful,
HB

Diva Quote: "We have to start teaching ourselves not to be afraid” William Faulkner

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Day #363 - Ah Shucks...

Today one of the Realtors on my Agent Team dropped by a beautiful, hand crafted pen that he made himself w/the most gratifying note I have received in a long time. He wanted to thank me for acknowledging the wonderful job he does with the Buyer's we have had him represent over the last few years.

He told me not long ago that he has a hobby of making pens. I had recently seen this skill displayed at a friend of a friends house not long ago and admire it greatly. There are some really beautiful woods to choose from when designing a pen. I don't know how it is done, but the work seems intricate and can get very detailed. My Agent asked me at the time what my favorite color was "purple" - "ok" he said, "I will make you a purple pen"...I of course made noise about that not being necessary and left it at that.

Then this beautiful, wonderful surprise waited for me at the office when I got done with my Doctor's appointment this morning:


He says in his note that the wood is from South America and is called "Peltogyne" or "Purple Heart" and is the closest wood to purple he could find. I took another photo to see if I could show the purple color better:


Isn't it beautiful? I used the pen today at work today and wrote in careful cursive...it is hard to write sloppy with a special pen (although my cursive is pretty bad as well). I am considering keeping it at home so I don't do something dumb like lose it, but I would like to keep it in my purse so I can remember often how good it feels to be on the receiving end of someone else's gratitude so I am reminded to share my own more often.

Dave has started his own blog and his own goal to spread gratitude at:


Quote from Dave's Blog:
" I have a lathe and I make pens as a hobby.  I have decided to make 50 pens for 50 individuals who have had an effect on my life.  With these pens I will write a note telling them thank you for the effect they had on my life.  I will post their pictures on the blog and give them the pen I made them. This is not so much for them, but an exercise  to help me be more thankful for others and all they do, and have done for me in my life. "

My pen is #1 "The Purple Heart Pen". I am so honored and am excited to follow his journey.

I Am Grateful,
HB

Diva Quote: "The pen is the tongue of the mind.” Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

Day #362 - Medicine Man

Well, I've done and gone sick again...bah humbug. I feel like it is the change in altitude on my daily commutes. Over the last several weeks I have been spending 1/2 my day feeling like I am in a tunnel and having difficulty getting my ears to pop after the drive down the mountain. I have been fighting this thing off for over a month now w/vitamins and neti pots, but I think it is now getting the upper hand. Bummer.

Tomorrow I go to the Doc's office to see if I can get an antibiotic. I was reading a book the other day based in the "olden days" and a lady was giving birth. It wasn't super graphic or anything, but it was graphic enough to make me grateful we life in the age of medicine. Sure, we over do it sometimes and maybe it has turned us into wimps, but I am not going to complain about that.

I am going to be happy to spend some time tomorrow morning sitting in my Doctor's office to get some pills that will eventually clear my head up so my eyes don't feel like they are going to push out of my head, my nose feels like it's normal size, the noises around me aren't muffled and my upper teeth stop aching. Can't hardly wait!!

I Am Grateful,
HB

Diva Quote: "If you work in a hospital, you can't easily fake call in sick to work. 'Oh, you're sick? Well why don't you come in to work and we'll have a look at it?'" Jarod Kintz

Saturday, March 10, 2012

Day #361 - Get Groovy

I was driving to meet Travis for lunch at our favorite Indian Restaurant and was waiting at the longest stop light in history. It was one of those new, just before spring days after a storm has blown through. It looks like the air was just rinsed clean, it smells fresh, the sun is shining and it is not warm, but not crisp either...just beautiful.

While I was stopped at the light waiting my turn to go left I watched a lady walk up the sidewalk to the light to wait to cross the 4 lane street. I felt a moment of envy that she was outside enjoying that beautiful day. I took note she was most likely just out for a nice stroll since she was in levi's and a sweatshirt, but I also noticed she was wearing headphones...and half a smile.

Don't you often wonder what other people listen to when they exercises or stroll? Just as I started wondering she started snapping her fingers while her hand rested near her thigh and THEN her knees started bending alternately w/a little bounce hesitation at every other bend...it wasn't an exaggerated move by any means, but it was constant. The song "Single Ladies" by Beyonce came to mind and her bending her knees reminded me of that part in the music video...can't explain it...watch it if you don't know what I mean. I could tell she wasn't thinking of the traffic or worried if anyone was watching her; she was totally focused on the song in her ears.

I loved it - it made me smile - I shared her enjoyment for a minute while I waited. I felt gratitude in recognizing a simple, but joyful moment in someone else's life...and she shared it with me without even knowing it, without even trying. Thank you.

I Am Grateful,
HB

Diva Quote: "Dance for yourself, if someone understands good. If not then no matter, go right on doing what you love."

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Day #360 - Earlier Bird

Today I got to work early - yes, it is basically a miracle. I usually get in at 9 a.m. and I got there at 7:45 a.m. There is something so peaceful about being one of the first people in the office. What is strange is that I wasn't THE first person in the office.

I saw the Office Manager in the office before most of us and she is usually one of the last to leave with me in the evening...how many hours does she work anyway? She is one of those "sunny disposition" people. I don't think I have ever seen her upset. I have been able to tell she was irritated, but she chooses her words so carefully and always comes across in a positive way. I have just recently acknowledged a growing respect and fondness for her now that I have started to really LOOK at her and NOTICE how she is. She has always been this way, I have just not been paying attention. I think I can learn a lot from her.

There is another person that gets in at 7:30 a.m. every morning and she leaves at 4:30 p.m. every night...ON THE DOT. I find this fascinating...I shouldn't. Probably most people adhere to an absolute schedule. I don't think she would ever consider working overtime and I know she has passed up opportunities for more money and figure it is because she doesn't want a greater responsibility. There is something to be said for knowing your own limits and what will make you happy - I actually admire that about this person. She is happy just where she is, thank you very much.

I got so much done today, but am still SUPER behind. Trav has to go to work early tomorrow as well, so I will give it another go to see if I can jam through a pile of work early in the morning before my phone starts ringing. They say, "the early bird gets the worm" I say "the earlier bird gets a full hour of uninterrupted data entry".

I Am Grateful,
HB

Diva Quote: “I think we consider too much the good luck of the early bird and not enough the bad luck of the early worm" Franklin D. Roosevelt (hadn't looked at it this way...)

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Day #359 - What, What??

My Sister Amy actually has Internet now...AND email...ON a SMART PHONE...What? I cannot believe how long it took them to actually get Internet. I think they have been in their house for a year and 1/2 now. Today I emailed her and she emailed me back from her phone...Here are some wonderful things Amy will now be able to take advantage of:

* Facebook
* Inappropriate political & religious emails from our Dad
* email
* dictionary.com
* Access to her 3 sister's blogs
* Maybe she will start her own blog
* Advertising for her own business
* The translation of the phrase "Do you hear the words coming out of my mouth" into Mandarin Chinese

I am realizing the list can go on and on...the Internet is a wondrous thing and I cannot believe what we did before we had it and what we would do without it now...crazy how reliant we become on new technology. Congrats AMY!! Welcome to THIS Century!!

I Am Grateful,
HB

Diva Quote: "The Internet is the most important single development in the history of human communication since the invention of call waiting.” Dave Barry

Monday, March 5, 2012

Day #358 - Lame Brain

So, how gullible can I really be? I do think I might be too trusting in other people. Trav might say I just don't think things through. It was 9:30 p.m.  and there was a ring at the door bell. Naturally Trav has gone to bed already so I went to answer the door; looking out the window I saw a cop standing there.

"What now?" I think...mentally going over anything I may have done to upset my neighbors...can't think of anything. I open the door and the cop asks for the prior owner of this house. Color me relieved...then color me interrogated, "Where did he move to?" "How long ago did he move?" "What is his sign?"...wait, what was that last one? I actually asked the cop if he wanted to come in to see if I could find his phone number in the book...he moved like he might come in and then said, "no thank you, I'll be on my way."

HONESTLY - am I dense or WHAT??? After the cop left I began my journey into the story behind the story and here is what I think...Mr. Cop wanted to date Mr. Prior Homeowner...I tried to strain my brain to see if I noticed the pants were actually pull aways, but I think this guy may have been an actual cop, not the dress up kind. What kind of cop would go to a civilians house to return his driver's license...? That's right, the kind that wants to see you again after meeting at a friends party.

Well, I hope when the cop finds his new true love he tells Mr. Prior Homeowner "Thanks a lot for NOT disclosing the roof leaks!!!"

I Am Grateful (to not be murdered or robbed in my entry way right now),
HB

Diva Quote: "What do you mean you slowed down for that stop sign? If I was hitting you in the head with a hammer would you want me to slow down, or stop?" - Cop Joke

Thursday, March 1, 2012

Day #357 - Avoiding that Snowy Commute...?

Yesterday's commute was so tretcherous that I decided to leave the office at 3 p.m. today when I heard on the morning news the commute would be full of disaster again; I was just not willing to drive in it 2 days in a row. I actually ended up leaving at 3:30 p.m. with not a flake in the sky, but it looked promissing on the Mountain...really low white clouds - perhaps it was snowing up the canyon.

Nope - clear as a bell. Travis was home when I got here and it felt like a Holiday...like a snow day off from school. We snuggled into our PJs and watched a DVD...it is STILL not snowing. I feel a little embarrassed to tell the truth...Poor Baby. Oh well, it was worth a few vacation hours to get home early.

I Am Grateful,
HB

Diva Quote: "Getting an inch of snow is like winning 10 cents in the lottery.” Bill Watterson